half conscious and late

As I sit here at my desk I'm semi-awake b/c jr woke up in the middle of the night I thought it was 5 but I check my cell phone and it's only 2:30 a.m.  I try to get him back to sleep yet another battle almost an hr later 3:30 he was still up and I couldn't stay awake anymore his father took him to the livingrm and I tried to get some sleep but it wasn't good sleep.  I was woken up at 5:30 and stood in another 10 minutes I look outside the weather is horrible perfect to just stay inside and sleep.  I drag myself out of bed brush my teeth get dressed try to get my hair to look right which isn't an easy task due to rain and me having to wash it.   I then grab some cereal and get jr dressed and I figured since I got a ride I'd get to work on time WRONG.  I get on the train and take a good nap I wake up to feel the train not moving and I guess there were door problems or whatever or MTA incompetence that usually makes me late to work and finally we move I get to Essex St and by a miracle the J comes fast but when I finally make it to work 11 minutes late how annoying is that especially when the therapist is supposed to come over today.  I hope I will be on time the rest of this week b/c when you're late it just throws your whole day off.  The city is continuing to do more lay offs so the feeling of uncertainity comes back to me yet again I hear two people from our agency are being laid off w/o no real notice and that pisses me off b/c how dare you just spring something like that on people who have families, financial obligations, etc.  and not give them at a least a month or so to prepare themselves and then I thought about myself and thought this could happen to me! It makes me angry b/c I keep seeing other titles being hired that make a lot more money but they can't retain support staff those positions take more of the fiscal budget than our jobs so I decided today I'm cleaning out my desk of any junk or unneccessary things b/c I haven't received another at risk letter and I thank the lord for that but as I can see you have prepare yourself.  This way if it does happen I don't have anything here of importance and I can just turn in my key and be gone.   I also notice someone saying that this individual can be transferred somewhere else and they'd still have a job and while that may seem good to you some ppl don't like change and are creatures of habit and while I may still have a job I may not neccessarily like that place or be able to adjust there I've seen it happen to a lot of ppl.  For some people a city job is the end all say all due to the benefits and job security but not these days, Bloomberg wants to get rid of civil service, collective bargaining, something like Wisconsin can happen here but I think the fight here will be a lot more brutal than Wisconsin since NYC is a blue state if they did try to do that and not only that he wants to mess around with people's pensions and raise the retirement age.  All of it totally unfair people have worked hard and pay their due they deserve to retire with a decent pension at a reasonable age this is why we have to plan while we're still young b/c nothing is promised to no one these days.  I know I can find an office even in the private sector but some of these people don't know any other working environment and the city working environment and private sector are like apples and oranges.  Just when I thought I was secure for now always seems like something always arises.  I plan to start saving as much as I can just in case b/c unemployment doesn't always kick in right away and it's not what you were earning working either.  Today was supposed to be the day we go to the Sprint store but I doubt it due to the horrible weather unless it clears up as the day goes on.  Well it's after 9:00 going to begin my work day and try to stay awake.